New job, New Old Pants

I know, I know.

It’s been a long, long, long time since I’ve written anything.

I’m sorry, ok? I’ve been a little busy.

And it’s not just the kids that are keeping me busy nowadays.

I’ve decided to go back to work. To become a productive member of society again.
I actually did this last fall, but it was only part-time. Now it’s full time.

And I am in over my head, let me tell you.

But I always feel that way when I first begin something new. I was way over my head when I had my first, second, third and fourth baby.

And look how that turned out.

Anyway, just as I think I’m getting things in line, maybe even feeling like I know what I’m doing, I always do something to bring me back down to earth. To remind me that I’m the same clumsy, kluxy goofball that I’ve always been.

Today was a perfect case in point.

Now that I am a working woman, I cannot wear the blue jeans, shorts, athletic shorts and/or yoga pants that I so love to wear every day. No, now on the days that I need to go to my office or a meeting, I dress in skirts and dresses. Occasionally, I wear pants. Today was one of those days.

Since I was going to do some work, but not anticipating seeing anyone, I chose to wear a cute pair of capris that I haven’t worn since last summer.

After taking two of my four children to my parents’ house, I drove on to my office. When I parked and got out of my car, I noticed that one leg of my pants was tighter around my calf than was the other one. Since the pants have drawstrings around the bottom, I just assumed that one drawstring was tied tighter than the other. It was something I decided I would fix later.

But later never came. As soon as I went into my office, I had emails to write, phone calls to make, questions to answer and things to read. But each time I went to the bathroom or sat down in my desk chair and my pants legs moved up or down, I was reminded of the tightness of the one leg versus the looseness of the other. While in the bathroom one time, I did try to loosen the one leg, but found the knot in the drawstring was too tight to undo. So I gave up and left it as it was. But I did notice that the pants leg had a tab hanging out of it. A peach-colored tab that I tucked back up inside the pants leg.

I didn’t really think much more about the difference in the pants legs. I arrived home around 4:30 and made dinner. We ate early so we could take the kids to a movie in the evening. I thought about changing into a pair of shorts, but remembering how chilly movie theaters often are, I chose to stay in my pants.

So, needless to say, my pants did not get removed until after the kids were put to bed and I was ready for my pajamas.

It was then that I discovered why the one pants leg was tighter than the other.

It wasn’t the drawstring.

And it wasn’t that one of my calves is fatter than the other (like I had feared).

It had something to do with that peach-colored tab that I had noticed earlier in the day when I was trying to loosen the drawstring on the one leg. When I saw the peach-colored tab, I thought two things: 1) “huh? what is this tab for?”, and 2) “I don’t remember these pants having tabs.”

Well, my memory was right.

The pants don’t have tabs.

The peach-colored “tab” was a pair of underwear. Peach-colored underwear that I’ve been missing for the past year.

Missing underwear is not something I have time to spend on. If Butters loses the ONE pony tail holder that she thinks is tight enough for her hair, I look for it. If Butters loses the ONLY pair of shorts that she will wear, I look for them. If Ryan loses his blanket, I look for it. If Lauren loses her stuffed cow, I look for it. But a missing pair of my underwear, nope. No time for that.

So there it is. My tab was just a pair of missing underwear.

Although I now have a title other than Adam’s mom, Lauren’s mom, Elizabeth’s mom, Ryan’s mom or Mrs. Prys, I am still one and the same. The same goofy woman that I’ve always been. Just now, I’m walking around with underwear hanging out of my pants.

Oh, this new chapter of my life is gonna be fun!

5 thoughts on “New job, New Old Pants”

  1. This reminds me why I love you so much!! We are the same person … I think that’s what motherhood does to us (especially when we have a litter of children! 😉 )!

  2. Rene, that was hilarious. I have to say though that I have found various pieces of laundry that ended up stuffed inside a shirt sleeve or a pants leg. However, I never wore them. That could only happen to you.

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